ChaoticMusings

Digger wrote:

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Something once very nearly gave me PTSD.   Me and my boyfriend at the time, whom I later married, were staying at his sister's house while they were away.  We slept in their bed and were both stark naked at 3am when the sister and her husband unexpectedly came home a day early.   After drinking a skinful, the husband forgot we were in his bed and got undressed and got in beside us, luckily on my boyfriend's side.  I was absolutely traumatized, but was forced to ooze out of the bed like a oil slick onto the floor.  After desperate fumbling I managed to find my clothes and got dressed.  My poor boyfriend wasn't so lucky.  His brother in law, also naked, had entwined himself around him in a death grip!   

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Anon on the other thread is right - you really, really should write a book 

2 absolutely mortifying experiences for me immediately sprang to mind when I saw this thread. But if I say what they were, the peeps here will think ‘Meh…there’s that Vam being flashy again’  So, maybe not for now ….

Vam wrote:

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Digger wrote:

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Something once very nearly gave me PTSD.   Me and my boyfriend at the time, whom I later married, were staying at his sister's house while they were away.  We slept in their bed and were both stark naked at 3am when the sister and her husband unexpectedly came home a day early.   After drinking a skinful, the husband forgot we were in his bed and got undressed and got in beside us, luckily on my boyfriend's side.  I was absolutely traumatized, but was forced to ooze out of the bed like a oil slick onto the floor.  After desperate fumbling I managed to find my clothes and got dressed.  My poor boyfriend wasn't so lucky.  His brother in law, also naked, had entwined himself around him in a death grip!   

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Anon on the other thread is right - you really, really should write a book 

2 absolutely mortifying experiences for me immediately sprang to mind when I saw this thread. But if I say what they were, the peeps here will think ‘Meh…there’s that Vam being flashy again’  So, maybe not for now ….

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 Go on Vam....be yourself, sod what others may think.

 

 

Digger may have known this place, a hotel for the famous, also a late night drinking bar, run by a very formidable lady called Phyllis Lynott, mum of' Thin Lizzie's 'Phil....it was aptly called 'The Showbiz'.Phyllis was a character (she banned me and my husband (then new boyfriend) for kissing at the bar once, but she didn't actually go through with the banning.
Her son was the nicest quietest young man when he was there, the hellraiser he was reported to be never materialised in front of his mum.

Her place was always filled with fresh flowers. She said she had once met Gregory Peck, and he was so enamoured with her, he sent over from America, loads of fresh flowers weekly.
I tended to believe her, she was that sort of woman.

Vam wrote:

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Digger wrote:

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Something once very nearly gave me PTSD.   Me and my boyfriend at the time, whom I later married, were staying at his sister's house while they were away.  We slept in their bed and were both stark naked at 3am when the sister and her husband unexpectedly came home a day early.   After drinking a skinful, the husband forgot we were in his bed and got undressed and got in beside us, luckily on my boyfriend's side.  I was absolutely traumatized, but was forced to ooze out of the bed like a oil slick onto the floor.  After desperate fumbling I managed to find my clothes and got dressed.  My poor boyfriend wasn't so lucky.  His brother in law, also naked, had entwined himself around him in a death grip!   

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Anon on the other thread is right - you really, really should write a book 

2 absolutely mortifying experiences for me immediately sprang to mind when I saw this thread. But if I say what they were, the peeps here will think ‘Meh…there’s that Vam being flashy again’  So, maybe not for now ….

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 If I'm not mistaken Digs did write a book! A fantasy one.  If I'm mistaken and confused you with someone else on FH Digs In sorry but I'm pretty sure 

-- Edited by Fluffy on Tuesday 12th of August 2025 01:17:02 PM

Digger wrote:

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Seeing as my recollections of a  life lived caused some humour, share your life experiences, be they weird, funny, tragic, outrageous, or whatever.   Or not just yours but those eccentric people who left their mark on you.

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 Thanks Diggers, you’ve made my day. 

Fluffy wrote:

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Vam wrote:

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Digger wrote:

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Something once very nearly gave me PTSD.   Me and my boyfriend at the time, whom I later married, were staying at his sister's house while they were away.  We slept in their bed and were both stark naked at 3am when the sister and her husband unexpectedly came home a day early.   After drinking a skinful, the husband forgot we were in his bed and got undressed and got in beside us, luckily on my boyfriend's side.  I was absolutely traumatized, but was forced to ooze out of the bed like a oil slick onto the floor.  After desperate fumbling I managed to find my clothes and got dressed.  My poor boyfriend wasn't so lucky.  His brother in law, also naked, had entwined himself around him in a death grip!   

---

 
Anon on the other thread is right - you really, really should write a book 

2 absolutely mortifying experiences for me immediately sprang to mind when I saw this thread. But if I say what they were, the peeps here will think ‘Meh…there’s that Vam being flashy again’  So, maybe not for now ….

---

 If I'm not mistaken Digs did write a book! A fantasy one.  If I'm mistaken and confused you with someone else on FH Digs In sorry but I'm pretty sure 

-- Edited by Fluffy on Tuesday 12th of August 2025 01:17:02 PM

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 Yes, I've written a few.  Not really fantasy, but involving time travel for two of them.   How the first book came about was a bit weird.  I had a reading at a mind body spirit fair with Simon Goodfellow, a well known medium.   He told me I'd be writing a book about America.  At the time I was like, er no chance of that even though in the mid 1980s I used to write articles for the Manchester Evening News.   I'd not written for years.    Then one day I was reading an article in the Mail about Lewis Thornton Powell and his image wouldn't let me go.  I did some research and found his biographer, got friendly with her, and spent two years and with her help writing the book that weaves a story around him.   I had the help of  several American historians, people who shared all their research with me.  They were all so kind.  I decided to self publish as the book is 500 pages long and no mainstream publisher would ever take that on.   And I wanted complete control over my work.  

If you don't know who Lewis Powell is you can read about him here.

 

https://www.lewisthorntonpowell.co.uk/

 

Digger wrote:

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Syl wrote:

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I remember going into a late night cabaret club in town after hours to meet my then boyfriend and his brother. His brother worked there. He said it had been dead that night, the singer showed up, was useless, and very unusually, they had to cut his act short and pay him off because he was being booed so much.

It was Gerry Dorsey, a few weeks later he changed his name to Engellbert Humperdinck, got his big break, and the rest is history.

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 This is kind of a reply on the other thread.   

I got dragged out one night to a pub where there was a male stripper.  It's not really my scene but my friend loved it and I went along.   After much anticipation from the mainly female audience, and to a fanfare of the opening score of Star Wars, out pranced Darth Vader....or should I say, Temu Vader.  He was short, wore the worst cheap looking costume you could dream up and reeked of BO.  But...what he lacked in charisma he made up for with enthusiasm and the Force was certainly with him.  

He leapt hither and yon, gyrated his mum bum, breathed asthmatically in our faces,  and as his pièce de résistance, yanked off his plastic cod piece to reveal a ten inch dong.  The place erupted.  I kept backing up towards the bar, because the stench from his armpits would have felled a Wookie. Then he grabbed this poor girl, made her sit on a chair and did unspeakable Palpatine-esque things to her.   

He was he first and last stripper I ever saw, thank God.

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 He sounds quite, err...impressive.

Billy HOT Rocks is the only male stripper I saw live, but I knew a lad, young, dead fit, and he tried his hand at it.

He said all the seasoned pros tied an elastic band round their semi erect penis, to look better endowed.

Your Darth would have excelled at that.

 

I did work in the Isle of Man in a cabaret club one summer. I stayed on into the Autumn, the club became quiet, so to draw in more people they hired a female stripper, her name was Sylvia....it wasn't me.

 

 

Okay, you guys did ask! 💁🏻‍♀️ Sorry if it’s a bit long-winded, but the devil’s in the detail 😉

I used to live near the Knightsbridge Barracks in London, and my favourite and most convenient place to walk my dogs was in the part of Hyde Park where the Household Cavalry would often be out, in their full regalia, doing their ceremonial events training and rehearsals.

As we’ve often seen, their stunning black horses are biiiiig - never less than 16 hands big. Up close, they seem gigantic.

I had 2 Shih-Tzus. Don’t believe all the hype about smaller dogs being yappy and clingy. Some are, yes. But my 2 girls? THE most placid and chilled dogs imaginable. Any more laidback, they’d have been comatose! 

My dogs understood why they were put on this earth:

- To give unconditional love and affection, which they did in abundance - 14 & 15 years of joy and laughter.

- To placidly sit while complete strangers approached to ‘ooh & ahh’ over them, and wanting to pet them.

- To eat cheese!!! 🐶🐶 Anytime, any place, anywhere! They were never allowed to sit/beg near a table at mealtimes. So they learned to maintain a respectful distance and just patiently sit there like two furry bookends, all soulful sighs and puppy dog eyes, while hope sprang eternal that they’d get lucky.

So you get the picture? Perfectly docile, people/kid-friendly, well behaved little ladies. People would sometimes say “Your dogs are better behaved, have better haircuts, and are cleaner than people I know!” And I suspect my Mamma probably loved them more than me - and oh man! They sure knew how to play her! 😂

But when it came to even the faintest sound of horse hooves, they would instantly tense up and morph into demonic water-soaked gremlins! 

(part 2 coming up, cos I’m getting embarrassed at how long this is taking 🤦🏻‍♀️😂)

I waited up till you finished part 2 of your story....aww, I can just imagine your embarrassment Vam.

Those Cavalry horses are huge, extremely  beautiful animals. Thank goodness they are well trained, a kick off one of them would have been catastrophic.